The World Has Been Taken Over...

...by Mojo Jojos.

Warning: I haven't ranted in a long, long time - may contain explicit content - and TODAY was a very rant worthy day. So here goes.

Mojo Jojo #1:

The Cognitive teacher. GOD she is NUTS! Again, our classroom was taken over by all teachers for Du'aa and another Quran Khwani. Okay, so we stuck around outside, no problem. Then the Cognitive wali calls us inside and goes all "Jis ne Quran nahi parhna wo kaam karay beth ke" we were all okay, sure, better than sitting outside with nothing to do. So, she tells us to get out our photocopied notes of a real brain and draw that, sitting there, and "No tandence vill be marked of any studant, if studant not do wurk. The person who do not draw, absent I vill make tham for two days. Are you understand?" We were all understand very much. A brave, brave soul asked her how to draw from a picture of a real brain (since she accepts only a carbon copy. Anything else is "garbage"). The teacher stared. Then "you have hand. And eyes. And pancil and rubber. What is your problem, eh?". Obviously, there was nothing we could do, so we started drawing it. Everyone finished in about half an hour, and she made us SIT there for TWO! Ye kya bakwas hai?

Mojo Jojo #2:

The gym. Okay, so I had fun there today. There's this Stats teacher who teaches Section A and absolutely DESPISES Section B. I'm in B. And she's extremely sarriyal, btw. Lol. So, we're in the gym, exercising together, and I notice she's exercising on a machine thats out of order. I dare to point it out to her and (I was amazed) she LAUGHED and said "Beta, I can't do this on the other one that works cause mera weight itna zyada hai it slides on the floor"
HAHAHAHAHHAHA uff yar. It was good, she was cracking jokes about her weight and making us all laugh, and was ASTOUNDED that we could cycle for more than 10 minutes at a time (lol). Oh and Section A refused to believe this when I went and told them. Ha.

Mojo Jojo #3:

Psychopathology. I love this teacher. She's also the head of the Psychology Department. I really like her. BUT for one whole hour she makes us write and write and write andwriteandwritewritewrite....you get the picture.

Mojo Jojo #4:

(Mobiles aren't allowed in our uni and if confiscated, have a 20% chance of being given back)
THIS one REALLY pissed me off. While I was at the gym, there was an apparent 'mobile raid' in our class. When I came back, my friends literally pounced on me and "TUMHE PATA LAGA?! Sab ke cell phones le liye hain!" At first I thought it was a joke. Then I looked at Aamna's face and...well the floor literally wasn't there for a minute. I've had my mobile taken before and I believe in miracles now, because I miraculously got it back. The thought of it being taken again....I don't even want to think the thought. Ab I was told ke Aamna ne class mein BOHAT zyada volume per gaanay lagaye huay thay. This teacher from some other department was outside our class and no one knew. She came inside and snatched Aamna's cell from her. Madi was sitting beside Aamna and the teacher said, "OYE larki! Tumhare pas hai cell phone?" And Madi being an ABSOLUTE GENIUS took it out of her bag and handed it to the teacher. Satisfied, the woman left. Now Aamna's running around here and there, talking to all our teachers, somehow trying to get her cell back. Madi the Genius is crying and shrieking "Mera cellphone chala gya, mein kya karun!". Everyone was really mad at her especially yours truly. Khud day kar ronay beth gai hai mera cell phone chala gya. Fuckingidiotpissoffinacorneranddie!

Mojo Jojo #5:

Psychological Testing. I HATE the woman who teaches this. She has no respect for any student and is also the most BADTAMEEZ person I have ever met. And she is not young. Which makes it worse. She takes our class for about 25 minutes, max. One class is supposed to last an hour. And while graciously grabting us her holy presence during these precious 25 mins, she dictates whole chapters. AT THE SPEED WITH WHICH SHE SPEAKS. Apparently, she believes that we write at the same speed with which she speaks. And if we don't, well then. We're retards. So simple. B****.

Mojo Jojo #6:

Khan ignores everything I say. YES, I shall whine. I'm not an idiot, I get a good GPA because I listen to the teachers. No, I'm not bragging - this is fact and related to what I have to say. We have a lot of assignments we have to hand in on Monday, and she was discussing with her group members how to arrange the one for Psychopathology. I was sitting with them and explained the whole layout. Everyone agreed with me, EXCEPT for my so-called best friend. Khan was all "Nai, aise koi nai karna." Fine then, fuckyou. Who's assignment is always better huh?

Mojo Jojo #7:

I understand well-meaning family, but there is a fucking huge difference between being well-meaning and just plain interfering. My family does (apparently) not realize they interfere. To extreme extents. A certain close family member called at home today, and I picked up. At first, she talked to me as if I were 5 and even then, mentally retarded for my age. Then she asked all sorts of questions about my studies, family, and especially, my personal life. And THEN she proceeds to asking questions like "Beta, tumhari shaadi kyun nai hui abhi tak?" HELLO?! I'M FUCKING TWENTY YEARS OLD WOMAN, NOT FORTY! The rest of her crap, I don't even want to repeat.

Oh, and today, we dusted the computer lab. Because the safai walay all refused to do so, telling our Head of the Department, "Baji, ye hamara kaam nai hai". She then asked for volunteers and promised to help us. So, I volunteered cause hardly anybody else was. By the time we started the dusting, the safai walay were goggling, and all the other girls were coming in and poking fun at us. So mature.

Is it any wonder I HATE studying here?!

End of rant. Thankuplis.

P.S. If anyone gets to this point....I applaud you. Seriously. And you are very, very waaila/wailee. Lol.