Awardings.

Furree Kat you're brilliant (HAHA). Thank you so much for the award! =)

I'm too lazy and unimaginative to come up with 7 facts about myself so... Yeah I'll just forward it to 7 other people.

S.C. who is sototallycompletely awesome. 

The Me who has one of the most fun and like-able blogs ever.

Qaiser ... just because.

A.T. because awesome-ness to is par khatam hai na.

A.Z. because her blog is cute and sweet and because she's family.

H.K. because she's one of the most creative people I have ever known. Do check out her site.

Fatu - Maa. Because I love her.

Dutch Chocolate.

Loyalty is a very, very rare trait.

Gem # 4.

Maryam: Wanna cookie? ;)

AT: 'Cause I'm the cookie monster?

No, thanks. I have a figure to keep

34-38-36.

Goddamn. ;)

AT: DID I SAY 38

DAMMIT

28.

Maryam: Bus.

Ab to chapp gya

AT: Naheeen

WHERE?

Maryam: BLOG.

AT: Nahin na

my figure's our secret ;)

Maryam: Nope

now the world will know

AT: :(

I'll have to hide somewhere then

The world wants me

Maryam: ...

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I asked my client's mom how many people lived with them. She said '30-40'.

I still don't know whether its the truth or not. Oh, well. Goes in my report anyway.

Status-ing.

I started this new status rave too. You know. Give me a number, I'll be oh-so-nice to you on my status. Blah. The statuses were really hard to write because you have to come up with new and inventive ways of telling everyone the same thing. That they're nice and you can't live without them. So, anyway. The interesting thing is the reactions I got after updating my status just cracked me up (and some made me go all 'awww'). One status (honest wala tha ye) went out to a really close friend. Here's what happened (I was too lazy to edit) *gaali alert*:

A: i wana do this thing too. uni ki friend ne kia. oshi ne kia. ap kar ri ho. but i dont have nice things to say about people. LOL

Me: haha i know which is why i wasn't doing this pehle

but i figured what the heck

buri cheezein be likh dun gi

A: isi liay na awesome ho tum.

Me: love you

number bata

12:34am

A: bataya to hai sali

parhti hai nai

bantay rakh le tu

choti to hai he

sath sath nazr bhi kamzoor.

M:

A: acha nai mera baby

lamba chaura

gora chita

bilkul sahi nazr wala

mwah:p

M: hahaha kuttiya hai tu

A: han maaloom hai

M: *after status update* ja parh mar le

A: haramzadi he rehna

tu cheap

tera khandaan cheap

teri anay wali naslaein SARI cheap

loser tum

aur tumhara khawand

bas baki mein theek hoon

HOE TERI BHAIN

han now i m fine.

M: hahahahahaha

I LOVE YOUUUUUUUUUUUUU

KUTTI

BC

A: hahahah i love you too man

were the above stated love notes not enough to show you that

Sab Sahi Kehte Hain.

Psychology parh parh ke waqai pagal ho jatay hain. Proof mulaahiza farmaiye:

Today I had a huge, huge test which included whatever we had studied up till now and let me tell we'd studied A LOT. I got home around 7 p.m. and decided I'd start studying in an hour.

Around 9, I sat in my bed staring at my window.

At 9:37, I pulled the covers over my head and went to sleep.

I set the alarm for 5 a.m., thinking I'd get up extra early and just give my notes a reading.

At 5 a.m., my alarm rang and I switched it off thinking "Aaj to chutti hai, jaldi uth ke kya karna hai?" And then promptly went back to sleep.

At 6 a.m., I woke up in a panic and jumped out of bed, grabbed my books and sat back on the bed. I stared out of my window some more, played with my mobile, messaged most of my friends and then stared out the window some more. Reluctantly, I fingered my notes and made little doodles here and there.

Around 7 a.m., my brain stopped working completely. I took 7 to be 9 a.m. and ran out of my room collecting my stuff, changed into puranay, paindu clothes and ran downstairs. Made chai, grabbed some more stuff and was out of my house and shivering outside in the for by 7:30. I started hyperventilating thinking "GARI KYUN NAI AI ABHI TAK?!" and then I noticed it wasn't 9 (the time I have to leave), it was 7:30.

I went back inside and sat back down very happy. Because now I could play It Girl and download stuff. No need to study for the test, OH NO. So that's exactly what I did and then went at my usual time.

When I came back home, I asked my sister "Tomorrow's a holiday for you too, right?"

Sister (Sid) *staring at me like I'd grown another three heads* "SHABAAAASH. Kahay ki chuti hai, beta? Aap ko be chuti nai hai".

Me "Oh... I thought kal Saturday hai".

Sid *more staring and shaking her head* "..."

P.S. This guy at my university added 8.5 teaspoons of sugar to a minuscule excuse of a Styrofoam cup of chai.

11-Dec-10

Bohat gaaliyan parein gi mujhe is header per. Koi baat nai. Change is good. Even if its... Like that.

Acha.

And thank you to all those who commented on my previous post, you guys are the best.

Plague.

I'M the plague. ME. Guess why? Two reasons.

1. I cover my head.
2. I'm Shia.

Bus jee. I didn't know I was contagious. Where I study now, the friends I used to have in school are of course horrified by both these things. And even for those who've been really close friends for years? I'm a problem. Because I don't go out in Muharram (no, not because I'm 'forbidden', I choose not to), I don't listen to music or watch movies AND OH MY GOD HOW TACKY IS THAT.

A friend of mine, someone I've known for YEARS called me up specially to make me admit somehow that I (being Shia) am wrong about all my concepts about religion, I live in a fantasy world, I'm a masochist and whatever I do during Muharram is apparently completely senseless and ridiculous. I have only two simple words to say in response:

Fuck off.

I have never engaged in religious debating because it always ends up turning into a massive fight, and also because I really don't care what the other person perceives religion as. Everyone follows their own school of thought, I leave you alone, you should have the respect to leave ME alone. But this is insane, most of my friends calling me up and telling me how wrong I am, how I'm 'dozakhi' and I should convert now, before its too late.

No disrespect meant to anyone but why is it your problem? It has absolutely nothing to do with you. Why SHOULD I convert to whatever point of view, school of thought or religion you want me to? What business is it of yours if I believe what I believe?

Upar se ye bloody insensitivity. Nahi pata ek cheez ka to mut bolo. Senseless nonsense le kar shuro ho jayen ge sab. I have to listen to this every bloody year (pretty sure all practicing Shias do) but this year its getting so bad I don't know what to do.

I've said it to you in person (in nicer terms) and you didn't understand. So here, I'll spell it out for you:

Leave me the fuck alone.

P.S. This is a very condensed version of what I actually wanted to say. But I can't. So... yeah.

Een.

Mehreen Ali Kasana, I am very, very proud of you. Just wanted to say.

Love,

Yammay.

Sab He Bhookay Hain.

A: Kal F shayad cake laye. Birthday ka.

Me: Acha? Oh ho, meine wish nai kiya.

A: Waise confirm nai hai. Per kar do. Meine be kiya hai. Cake anay ke chances barh jayen ge =D

Me: Pehle bolna tha!

Me: Kar diya text =D

A: Tum bhi bolna cake lao. Shayad waqai le aye. Hamari supervisor be bol rai hain usay.

Me: ...

KAHA tha na.

What mental disorder do you have? Your Result: Manic Depressive You have extreme cycles of highs and lows.  Sometimes you feel like you don't know who you are.  One week you could be very hyper and happy and the next week you are slow and depressed.
ADD (Attention Deficit Disorder)
GAD (Generalized Anxiety Disorder)
OCD (Obsessive Compulsive Disorder)
Paranoia
What mental disorder do you have? Quiz Created on GoToQuiz

Meri behn to boht he kharab hai, bichari.

What mental disorder do you have? Your Result: GAD (Generalized Anxiety Disorder)   You can never seem to calm down and always feel anxious for unknown reasons.  You tend to not be able to concentrate and have headaches or other anxiety symptoms.
Manic Depressive
Paranoia
ADD (Attention Deficit Disorder)
OCD (Obsessive Compulsive Disorder)
What mental disorder do you have? Quiz Created on GoToQuiz

B.M.

I officially have this huge crush on Bruno Mars. Yeah, yeah I know, everyone does. BUT I was one of the firsts so... Oh well, its still dumb.

Who Is.
Grenade.
Runaway Baby.

*dil*

Haye.

Some Things Never Change.

Maryam turned on her laptop at 2:00 p.m., with the very pious and noble decision of starting (for the first time in her life) her homework before Monday morning.

It is now almost 7:00 p.m.

How much have I done you ask? A lot. Yes, a lot.

I played It Girl and Sorority Life (no judging).

I talked to random people on FB chat, MSN and Google Talk (yes, simultaneously, I am an awesome multi-tasker).

I updated my Flickr account.

I called up my friends.

I talked to my dad on Skype. Who was in his office. Yes, in this same city.

I admired his newly shaved head. (Haji Dad, Mashallah).

I ate French Fries.

I scanned my taplop for viruses.

Then fiddled around with the Control Panel.

And my Hotmail account (which is screwed, btw ignore the crazy emails).

The biggest accomplishment? Joint conversation with Ugly Duckling and Ecstasies Unrevealed.

So, I'd say I need counseling or possibly Psychotherapy SINCE I HAVE 10 BLOODY REPORTS TO TURN IN MONDAY MORNING, 9:00 A.M. But I still have "insight into my problem" so I don't qualify.

What?

I Love Cheap Songs.

No, really. I do =P

I know. I don't like the new header either. But I can't find anything... And I'm too lazy to search for something good.

If you have any suggestions, please rescue my poor, gay blog.

Thank you.

Thought.

I don't think I can do this anymore.

Bakray Do Hazaar Dus.

This is our first ever Eid without our parents. Honestly, I wasn't looking forward to it at all. All I wanted to do was huddle in my warm, bouncy bed with a huge mug of coffee, masalay walay fries and my books (all on my laptop, sadly they aren't available here yet).

But, no.

We had to go to Islamabad since they're the closest family we have (on my dad's side) and because we usually always spend Eids with them. So, we went.

AND IT IS SO BLOODY COLD.

Don't get me wrong, I love the weather but this damn flu is making everything look bad. Anyway. We went hiking again =D

I hate hiking, usually but the weather was so awesome and the trial was so so so so beautiful it was impossible not to have fun. Then later that evening, it started raining. And we played badminton in the rain.

So you can imagine my... Discomfort. First hiking (and it was around 3 hours long) then playing badminton. And oh, yes lets not forget our friend the flu and the temperature and the sore throat. But its been good. Really, I'm surprised we had fun =P

Bus ab I can't wait for my parents to get back. No, I don't care if its uncool to miss my parents, I really do miss them.

Hope your Eid was good, too =)

Photo-Mania.

GCU.

You're supposed to click on that =P

SC.

S: I like your pout.

M: Aw <3. You da man, S!

S: You the babe! *pouts*

Yes, we all know how much of a narcissist I am. S is my very special friend in India. Shez da man, yow.

The weird part is, S says she really likes my scarf/dupatta. And my friends/family/teachers HERE ask me to take it off all the time. Ironic? I don't know what it is but it really weirds me out. No, this is not an invitation to start a religious debate. Just a comment.

12 Days.

Does this mean I've started getting a life? Ha, no thanks =P

I've decided I made the biggest mistake of my life choosing Psych as my major. And that too Clinical Psych. I should have saved up and bought a kick ass camera and should have gone to photograph other people's weddings. Because I'm good. Oh, yah. Haha, no really. I wish I could do that. But anyway.

No updates from the GCU side. Not that there aren't any. Quite a few, in fact. I'm just too lazy to go there. Picasa 3 used to be my best friend but is failing me now. Picnik is too fake. And I'm too dumb to learn Photoshop. Hm. I'll make that my summer project. If I get a weekend or two off, no summer holidays for me.

My attention span only seems to last a few seconds -_-

TIKKA YUM HOTA HAI.

My brothers and their friends are up partying on the rooftop. Barbecue kar rahe hain. Jee, khud. Sid and I were sad and drooling since we'd be doing without. And then D came down with this HUGE plate of tikka boti and it is BEYOND awesome. OM NOM NOM x infinity. Haha, I can hear Atif and Florida =P

I love D <3

5th November.

Is a big, big day.

I can't believe you're leaving. Getting married is the same as leaving acha, you're ditching me. I miss you so, so much already.

I still can't believe it.

I hope you're really, really happy. Really. Always.

I love you. Sometimes.

Haha.

- M.

P.S. I'm in shock. Thus the incoherency. See, this time I have an excuse for being inarticulate =D

Happy To Me.

Aj to birthday ka pata he nai laga guzar gai =(
Honestly? Worst birthday ever.

Monday, November 1st.

So.

Tomorrow we start the real work. We go to special education schools and work with the kids there. ACTUAL work. Not just tests and interviews but therapy sessions. We don't even know HOW to apply the incredibly complicated therapies =/

Frankly, this is scaring the shit out of me. I know, I know. I'm not supposed to say that. I'm just afraid I
a) Won't be able to help them or
b) Might (God forbid) hurt them even worse.

I really, really hope I get the hang of it soon. Because this isn't about passing and failing your semester. This is about some child's entire life and the effect you'll leave on it. Or I'll leave on it. I don't know how to explain exactly what I need to say and I know I sound stupid.

Just pray for the best. Okay? Thanks.

Sardiyaan AA GAYEEN!

You.

Me.

Coffee.

Fries.

Rooftop.

Sleepover.

Best <3

Sometimes, I Love Psychology.

Okay some of these you might not find funny (or maybe none of these) but in light of what we're doing in class these days, they cracked me up. Some of them. The Freud one was best =D

Seeing ourselves as others see us would probably confirm our worst suspicions about them.Franklin P. Adams 

If you think you are too small to make a difference, try sleeping in a closed room with a mosquito.African Proverb

People used to explore the dimensions of reality by taking LSD to make the world look weird. Now the world is weird and they take Prozac to make it look normal.Bangstrom

A wonderful discovery, psychoanalysis.  Makes quite simple people feel they're complex. S.N. Behrman

A good friend can tell you what is the matter with you in a minute. He may not seem such a good friend after telling.Arthur Brisbane

I told my psychiatrist that everyone hates me. He said I was being ridiculous - everyone hasn't met me yet.Rodney Dangerfield

We spend the first twelve months of our children's lives teaching them to walk and talk and the next twelve telling them to sit down and shut up. Phyllis Diller

You talk to God, you're religious. God talks to you, you're psychotic. Doris Egan

Freud: If it’s not one thing, it’s your mother.

21-10-10 - The Birthday That Is Spashul.

AT, you're my girlfriend. No two ways about it, that's what you are for me =D

You're also my sounding board.

And my fellow whiner.

And you're one of my children too.

So, yes. Your birthday is vary spashul as far as I'm concerned. You deserve a cake. A spashul one. Something like this one:

Aw *hug*

You're like, totally, my gal. Yah? *snaps gum*

Flow.

The board outside our department says 'Clinical Phychology'.

Yes, it really is spelled that way.

You know those long, flowy, straight um... kameez type things with no 'chaak'? I don't know what they're called. They look so pretty on others but I look like I'm wearing a nightgown =(

And I tripped on the stairs because of said nightie. Sigh.

I hate being so tired all the time. It feels like I'm in a hazy stupor. And things are only going to get worse later on.

The up side? I'll be a qualified Clinical Psychologist by the end of two years and will be allowed to practice but under supervision. Wow? You bet.

HK.

Just a tiny shout out to one of my favorite footwear and accessory designer *wink*

Happy Birthday, HK!

<3

Oh, Shoot Meh.

I can't believe these words are coming out of my mouth. MINE.

But my previous university was better.

Yeah, those of you who know how much I bitched/moaned/whined/cried about previous uni, you know how huge a statement that is.

I can't even begin to describe the disappointment, anger and disillusionment. Today was a day of many, many negative emotions. Many.

Gender Psychology =D

I love these facts! The tenth point is the absolute best! Haha take a look:

1. Men change their minds two to three times more often than women. Most women take longer to make a decision than men do, but once they make a decision they are more likely to stick to it.

2. Based on the total number of people tested since IQ tests were devised, women have a slightly higher average IQ than men

3. Women are better than men at remembering faces, especially of females.

4. Men are more likely to help than women!

5. Women are more pessimistic when predicting their work results.

6. Most women tend to believe that they are only good at certain tasks, but not capable of being good at everything.

7. Women are more fearful and anxious than men.

8. Women are twice more talkative than men! It has been estimated that on average, men speak 12,500 words and women speak about 25,500 words in a day.

9. Men, on average, think about sex every 7 seconds.

10. The female brain is much more adept at reading subtle facial and verbal emotional expressions.  Some women say that only when men see actual tears do they realize that something is wrong. This is why women have to cry four times more than men do, to signal distress.

Reference: http://www.tastyhuman.com/10-interesting-facts-about-gender-psychology/

12th of October and 2010.

So, mama's started to respond to medication. After 10 horrible, scary days. She's getting better. Thank you all so much for the love and support and texts and calls, it meant a lot to me =)

As far as the new university is concerned, now I'm sure they're trying to kill us. Nobody and I mean nobody has a schedule and work-yourself-to-the-grindstone policy like we do. Sab ki M.S. degree is relatively relaxed and laid back. While we are having breakdowns and facing paranoia and hysteria before every class and guess what? Its only the second week.

We're supposed to get a welcome party this Friday. We were happy. Then I found out that its going to be in our very own classroom, not in any hall, thank you very much. In ko halls ki kami hai? OH, yes mustn't miss out on the other happy news. We have classes before the party. How fun. Take your morning class then go and eat lunch then stare at your seniors trying to amuse you with... Well lets not go there. That's not what I'd call any sort of party. That's what I would call something that MUST be missed. Make your own plans, go somewhere, for Chrissake just give us some money and we'll go out ourselves if that's what you want. I mean, what?! How boring. Har waqt parhai. I ALWAYS get stuck in places like these while my sister has all the fun with a black and white themed welcome party that if nothing else starts in the evening. Did I mention I have mine at 12 noon?

*rolls eyes*

Okay, enough with the bitching I'm sure you guys get sick of me but honestly? This is what I have my blog for, I don't complain anywhere else =P

Oy, F.

Yeah, you. Jis ki ek maheenay baad shadi hai. I miss you like hell and I don't know what I'm going to do after you go. Not that we meet all that much now but still. Its just the comfort of knowing you're there. I can't call and wake you up at night saying I'm bored. I can't text you all day sending hugs and kisses. No more sleepovers?! Haha. You're probably the only person in my family that I think of as one of my absolute best people. I know, I know. Getting ahead of myself and all. But I miss you.

Haha I'm getting nostalgic already. I love you, FM. No, not FMS just FM =P

Update 07-10-10

I felt so out of my league when classes started.

But I think I'm doing pretty well now.

I'd have to be pretty dumb not to because we get quizzed every day so I HAVE to study 5 minutes before every class (2 classes a day - 2 hours each!). Gone are the days when the only studying I had to do was a couple hours before the exam.

Anyway. It does give you a definite advantage.

But yar. S-P-L-I-T-T-I-N-G headache =(

Ain't That The Sad Truth.

Go.

You know, I never really believed any of those over-used, fucked up, over-dramatic cliches. And now, I can't help but think, speak and act all of them.

Its amazing what it does to you, knowing someone that you would give your life for is hurting or ill. In this case, Please pray for my mama.

04-10-10

I'm really not in the mood for a long post gushing about how awesome my first day was because honestly? It wasn't. It wasn't bad exactly, its just that I was exhausted and sick with worry because half of my family is ill. Like really ill. So I couldn't have cared less about today.

The staff was nice. Much, much nicer than my previous university. But I already have two assignments and homework O_o

The seniors were amazing, though. They gave us this really sweet impromptu welcome thing which felt really nice. So, yeah. It was hot and the day was way too long and the cafe is very expensive =(

Anyway. I have this splitting headache. I'll gush later. Ta.

P.S. I laughed myself silly after reading this crap (now this is what's called gushing and I excelled at it). So weird reading that. Haha.

After So Bloody Long!

My Moosa came to visit! And started playing with the webcam =P

King Moses.

Itna bara ho gya hai. Keeray jitna tha when I last saw him. Aw <3

Slam Dunk.

Oh, I wish I could see you right now.

I have so much to say to you.

And all of it.

Starts with fuck you, bitch.

Chup.

Meray ghar ke bahar ek darakht hai. Us darakht ke sath meray hamsaye mein bachon ne ek bakra bandha hua hai. Uss bakray ka naam Great hai.

Aur ye sari raat BAAAA karti hai, baray khaufnaak tareekay se.

P.S. Some of you who comment on my blog have limited your own. I can't see you. Change that? Bloggers are supposed to be narcissistic -_-

Die, GG.

Gossip Girl is driving me MAD. I HATE Dan in this season, Serena is and always will be a slut and Jenny is wah, bhai wah. Yeah, yeah I'm getting way too emotional about a dumb soap but seriously, how screwed up can you be? They touch new limits and cross weirder lines in every episode why are they so fucked up? I literally feel like banging my head against the wall. Wohi cheez, bar bar, bar bar. Bus be kar dein. Koi aqal wala plot daal dein. But then again, its idiots like me who keep watching for more lame plots. Blair aur Chuck ki mismanaged, unlucky zindagi ne to sad kar diya. Kya, yar. Acha bhala tha sab kuch. My rose colored glasses are so shattered now.

I know. You've lost all respect for me. Koi nai, happens to the best of us.

Its a disease, I tell you.

Stay away.

School.

I was a self-righteous bitch at school with an attitude problem due to major attacks of shyness. I couldn't talk to anyone without my tongue tying itself in knots, and by anyone I mean ANYONE. Class mates, juniors, workers, teachers. I was THAT shy. Most of my college friends who read this will have heart attacks and die (shock se) but really. I was. That.

Now, for this exact reason I didn't have a lot friends at school. Total opposite in college (thank you God) but school was horrible. It was hell for me. My fault, my problem, blah blah. I was a child! =P

So, the point of all this nonsensical nonsense is that I miss that. One of my few regrets about school life. I see all my school friends being there for each other at every occasion (FB zindabad), be it weddings, or aftaris, or sleepovers or just plain 'hey, let's meet up' days. I want that too. I don't have the kind of friends that would stay with you for years and years and even if I did, its different with school friends. You know. They've known you since ugly Grade 1 stage till all the other classes until school ends. That's special. And I realize now how much I messed things up in school.

Khair.

I'm completely different now so maybe that counts for something =D

HELLO, GCU!

I PASSED GAT.

I REALLY DID.

I'M GOING TO GCU.

I ACTUALLY AM.

*luddi*

Meri Chatt Awesome Hai.

Okay, exuse the very poor picture quality, my camera is in the hospital and the only thing I had on hand was my mobile. So please those of you who photograph themselves, gimme a break, I miss my camera way too much already =P
I'm not being subtle. I meant UB. DON'T criticize me =P

Ek aur baat. Editing boht minimal hai. Ye waqai itna khoobsurat tha <3

The concentric circles (very faint but you can see them) actually looked like a rainbow. There were so many amazing colors!

The sun and the moon were out at the same time it was OUTRAGEOUSLY beautiful.

LOOK at those rays, they're astounding.

Split.

Quick update:

3.81 - 8th Semester GPA,
3.25 - CGPA

Call me ay GRAJUWIT now, thenx *puts on cool shades*

Of Bags.

There's nothing like buying something frivolous and/or useless to lift up your spirits after an exam that seemed like a cruel joke fate played on you. Yes, its a girl only thing. Jo bhi.

GAT was a cruel joke fate played on me. So, I would not like to discuss it.

However, mera GCU ka admission depends solely on this ghatiya test and... Well. See what I mean about cruel joke? I've been accepted, cleared the Clinical Psych test and interview both, and now if I don't pass GAT, ADMISHUN NAWT GRANTID. FU, I say -_-.

P.S. I never really realized just how lucky I am and have been throughout my life. I have never yet failed at anything I attempted and that's not because of me because I stopped working hard a long time ago. That's because of Him, up there. I am really very fortunate and I often forget that in my petty little sorrows and pity fits. There are very few people who can actually claim that they are living their dream. The day I first set foot in GCU, I just sent up one little prayer: Please God, let me come here. And to the last minute, I kept fighting and wasn't even willing to apply (some squabble over subjects and stuff). And now look at me. Here I Am. Even if they don't accept me, I know that I passed where it counted. I got my dream. And I'm one of the lucky few.

So, thank you.

=)

Bliss Hai Ye To.

Nothing, absolutely NOTHING beats Hardees ka Mushroom and Swiss Burger <3 x infinity. 

Aur Phir Aisay.

Shadeed farigh honay ka nateeja:

Haider sitting in his room, Maryam sitting across the hall in hers, and Sid sitting in front of her using the PC. 

Moving On.

So, since I'm this farig I'll be updating about whatever tiny thing happens. Occurs. Whatever -_-

Day looked marginally better when we (sister, brothers) hijacked the car and went off to M.M.Alam only to find out OPTP (one of my true louves) was closed. Sadness. No matter. I got fries and a hand-scooped chocolate milkshake from Hardees (another true louve). The shake is surprisingly not bad even with the mountain of whipped cream that tops it. Hand-scooped. Hath se utha ke daltay hain? I don't wanna know. Khair.

Now its back to my PC and headphones, trying to study and failing as usual. Yar itnay mushkil questions hain, they make my eyes bug out. I was reasonably confident on the grammar, vocab front but these... I don't even know what they ask for!

The Day.

I feel bad about ranting that way. But I was so mad. Still am.

Anyway.

Meri friends kabhi kabhi sakht paindu ho jati hain. What, may I ask, is wrong with spending the 2nd or 3rd day of Eid with friends? Permission hai, eidi hai, sab kuch hai then why not? Especially since this Eid nobody seems to be with family. Blah.

Aj ka din to phir Gossip Girl dekhte huay guzray ga. Boring.

Eid 2010.

Seriously, can you be any more selfish? JUST because of you, and yes all the blame is on your head; JUST because of YOU we're spending this Eid completely by ourselves. For the first time EVER. Now, normally I don't like family gatherings and such, because really what's the whole point of the huge fuss? But this year it was important. Because things were different. And just because of you.

And then you wonder why we can't stand to be around you, anymore.

Thanks. A lot. Really.

Eid Mubarak, everyone. Lets see how it turns out.

P.S. DO NOT ask me who I'm talking about especially those of you who are family =P

WOWZA?

Gornament Kaalij Unisenty, here I come.

Chocolate Chips.

Sitting on my chatt right now with this WONDERFUL thandi thandi breeze.

Having home made chocolate cheesecake.

And talking to one of my closest friends.

How much more perfect could this night be?

Uselessnes Ki Bhi Hudd Hoti Hai.

People can sometimes be really dumb. Sure, there have been myriad unbelievably brilliant inventions but to counter that, there are countless useless ones. For example :

Inventors. Who'd be one? After watching the Dragon's Den, you can see what  torrid time they get. It must be hit and miss too. I bet Trevor Bayliss cam e up with some howlers before making a wind-up radio. Well, let's look at some bizarre devices that some people think we need.

1. In 1909, some daft idiot came up with this flying cape idea for a fire escape. All it would serve to do is make you look cool has you plummeted to your inevitable firey cloaked death. To add misery to this, I'm almost certain that someone had already invented ladders by this point.

For more rubbish inventions read over.

2. The Butter Stick is a frankly mental idea. Butter isn't too big a problem is it? Not problem enough to warrant carrying it around in a glue dispenser surely? In fact, the only problem with butter is that you can't spread it sometimes, and the butter stick is surely going to be no help at all... unless you want a big round buttery ball of dough.

3. Now, one can almost see the logic in this. Duster Cat Slippers. They idle around your house doing very little except eating. Well, make them earn their grub by getting them to dust when they walk! Obviously you'll have to ignore the fact that they lick their anus, then inevitable trying and lick their paws, thus spreading cat anus all over your nice new floor boards. Other than that it's genius.

4. Honestly... just how stupid would you have to be to come up with an idea like this? Firstly, if you wanted to cool your grub down, you could merely leave it a couple of minutes before tucking in. If you prefer the process sped up a little, then you could buy an ordinary fan and aim it at the plate... as opposed to dangling it off your cutlery. Might make the washing up a bit tricky too.

5. This is almost brilliant. The self saluting hat. Walking along, you see a nice lady and *BAM* you tip your hat without having to move your hands. Therein lies the problem one suspects. Your hat moves up and down, (presumably making a fair old racket) leaving you looking like a pervy Inspector Gadget with his hands in his pocket.





As far as I'm concerned though, there is nothing more dumb than this:

... I haz no wurdz. 

Ab Bus Intazaar.

Ho gya interview. Umeed se behtar hua. The interviewers were VERY nice. Even though they know I was being dumb and avoiding questions I couldn't answer =P

To aur kya karti? Nai ki thi Clinical mein internship. Khair. Result's by the end of next week. If and IF I do get in, its still conditional because I haven't cleared GAT. Azaab khatam to honey nai, na.

Do pray. Plis keh rai hun =P

P.S. I lost my blog list =( those I forgot, please email me. Or FB pe galiyan de dena. With your blog link of course.

P.P.S. This is more of an Anushay type template but what the hell =P. You don't like it, its your job to recommend some good, fun templates. Acha?

Fatu-Maa.

I love you, Bhains.

Moo.

*dil*

Dekho.

20 rozay ho bhi gaye. Pata he nai chala haina?

NAI.

PATA CHALA. EK EK DIN KA.

Khair. Parson interview. Apparently they're asking for experience in your relevant field which I do not have. I have experience, yes. But in Customer Relations or HR. Not Clinical Psychology =D

Yay, me. Idiot na hun to. Dekhi jaye gi. Aur kuch nai to... Wo bhi nai pata abhi. Suggestions day do, thnkz.

Sehri Tak Jaago.

Maryam is a fat ... thing. Who is gorging herself on YUMMY Kitchen Cuisine ka YUMMY sa cake.

And she just had a mini-heart attack. No, not because of the gluttony.

Because when she opened the blogger page, it showed 47 posts and 18 followers. Then I figured out it was my sister's blog.

Ha.

Unpopular =P

So. Sehri tak jaagna has become normal now. For me. Who used to be in bed by 10. And up by 8. Animal bun gai hun mein.

Ellise

I really don't like this theme much. But I love her hair <3

Blah. PRINGLES khanay hain O_o

26-Aug-10

I hate platitudes. They make you look stupid and blind and dumb and they make me feel like screaming. Stop it. Okay? They don't suit any fucking occasion and you just end up making everyone hate you. So stop oozing all that fake honesty and try being honest for a change.

"Ho jaye ga, tension na lo."
"Koi masla nai. Kyun tension leti ho?"
"Farig hai sab. Kuch nai hota. Choro"
"DON'T WORRY MARYAM ITS ALL GREAT LETS ALL BE HAPPY LEETLE RAYZ OF POTTY SUNSHINE".

Idiot potty sunshine peeplez. They make me want to bash their heads against a cement wall. Not that I'm violent or anything. Oh, no.

Just stop it please, you make me sick.

Gornament Callij Unisenty.

Umer Khan, your comment cheered me up, it did =D - except for the spelling 'fairly well' part. I try to be much better than that, yes?

Anyway. The reason I've so pinned my hopes on GCU is because I have applied nowhere else being the dunbass that I am. Everywhere they ask for my result and I don't have it. So no admission. And Clinical Psychology is hardly a commonly offered subject. Hai kahan GCU aur PU ke ilawa? No, don't answer. I know kidhr hai but what the hell.

Btw, if its so bloody easy to get in there, how come all of my seniors applied and only one got in? My test was really bad maybe they'll take me =D

List 24th ko lagay gi. 12 baje ke baad, jee.

Okay, Wait.

I've never been this confused/tense/worried in my life. Its like I'm standing still in this circle while everyone else has goals and motives and aims and needs. I don't know what I want. I don't know what to do. I don't know where to go. I just don't know anymore. I'm having trouble putting things in perspective. What I used to do worked before... Now, it just doesn't.

Can We Stop?

I hate being the responsible, dependable one. I know I have to be. But I hate it anyway.

I'm making Butter Chicken Toasted Sandwich for aftari. And I'm making it completely opposite to the recipe =P
(who would want to eat a deep friend sandwich?!) 


So besides that I'm craving mocha shake. And I need ideas for sehri because I CANNOT go on eating parathay for another 23 days =/

Din boht araam se guzr rahe hain. GCU ka admission test hai and I can't study. I'm even having trouble writing this blog post. I'm brain dead and surly and cranky rozay mein because I LOVE food =(

Sigh. What can I say. I'm a glutton.

Kam Se Kam.

I looooove Doodh Jam-e-shireen <3

Aj rozay ka pata he nai chala itnay zyada kaam thay. Allah karay roz aisa ho. Result's not too far away now. I'm not very hopeful because I know I screwed up more than 10 times this last semester. I was that happy to be going away =P

But. Its all good. We'll see. Blah. Mausam itna pyara tha aj.

Chaye <3

Ullo.

MAKHIYAN KHA JAYEN GI MUJHE. This past month was one of the best months ever in this horrible year.  Also the most tiring with the endless mehmaan who stayed for weeks but anyway. Moosa, Ali, I love you guys and will miss you till the next time you come which may be another 4 years. Kulsoomiya, you're my jaan. Thokoon wali. Choti si. <3.

Meine apni mama ke kehne mein aa ke ye writing shuro ki hai aur meri jaan ko azab hai ye. Itna kam hota hai roz =/ Upar se abhi tak we're setting up this place. Viva bhi ho gya mera. Boht bura hua, lekin khair hai. Graduation totally khatam ab bus result ka intazar.

MS mein kahin admission nai hona mera. Tum sunao, kya hal chal? =P

AT.

Uglyduckling, I owe you one. No wait. Two. I owe you two.
=P

Cruising

Chalo kahin chalein. Manchester. Or maybe Istanbul. OMG Italy <3

So You See.

Death is all around you.

Carnivore Na Ho To.

Sid: I LOVE babies!

Me: Yeah, me too.

Sid: They're like so KOOCHOO-MOOCHOO-OM NOM-PRETTY SOFT PYARAY AWWWWWWW!!!!!!!

Me: ... Er.

Sid: I just want to EAT IM ALL UP.

Me: Tum pagal ho? You actually make me think you want to eatimm. Like EATimm. Asli wala.

Sid: Han na, their skin is so ssssoooooooooft it reminds me of chicken legs!

Me: Hahahah- wait, what?!

Sid: Gobble them up, om nom nom nom so yummy and soft and soft and yummy om nom nom nom.

Me: Allah Jee.

Sid: *after a pause* The thighs are the best part.

Doesn't Get Much Better Than This.

Storms every night, all night.

Waking up to beautiful non-sooraj mornings.

Everyday wali chaye aur digestive biscuits.

Pyaray clouds everywhere.

Chaddi friends coming to visit.

And best of all..

SATURDAY ISN'T SO VERY FAR AWAY  NOW =D

Baba.

Just 4 days till you get back. Every hour seems like a year. This month and a half was the longest you've ever been away and I can't wait till you get back. I love you ♥

What The...

I haz 64 followers?! Wowz. I am not baleev.

Seriously. I love you guys =D

P.m.

Heartsick.

4 and 5.

My post titles make absolutely no sense.

I AM FINALLY DONE WITH THE BLOODY INTERNSHIP REPORT AND I WISH I COULD GUZZLE DOWN CHAMPAGNE AND DANCE NEKKID ON MY ROOF TOP.

Yes, it was that bad.

But anyway, its over.

Viva mein alaa besti ho gai, 'fo sho' but I really don't care right now.

Yar. Meine nai agay parhna =(

Aur nai jee. Shaadi be nai karna, acha? -_-

3

So how about Coke Studio 3?

10:02 pm

Hello. I really need company. Of the sane sort. Goodbye.

Up and Down She Goes.

Are these crazy highs and lows because of the heat, the exhaustion or something entirely different? Its been an insane, CRAZY week. Its been amazingly good and stupendously horrible.

B, you were my so called best friend. And you let me down in the worst way possible. THE worst. Because this was the first time I really needed you and I pleaded with you to be there. I never, ever plead. You know that. And even then, you weren't there. Not when I needed you the most, so you know really, what's the point of pretending you're still going to be there in the future? Because if you weren't here at the most desperate and horrible time in my life... You won't be there ever. So I don't care if you read this and call me an unfeeling bitch, I'm through. Over.

As for the others. E, BK, J I love you guys. You've made my time here really amazing and seriously, I'm going to miss you like hell.

Its sad and sweet at the same time to know I've lost my oldest and closest friends, but gained three new and better ones.

Oh, God. My emotional drama will never stop, will it?

Ah well. Its a never-ending soap opera for you guys. Enjoy.

Shall We?

I know its stupidly clichéd but after a long, long time I feel completely happy, and centered and at peace with myself and all that shit =P

I'm content. Its nice to be this way =)

Aisay Bhi Log Hotay Hain.

My brother washes his bike with his branded shower gel. I asked him why he didn't use it on himself instead. He stared at me as if I'd taken leave of my senses and very slowly explained 'mein apne upar laga kar kya karun?'. So apparently, my brother cares more about his Honda's hygiene than his own.

Bulleh Shah.

The company arranged for a trip for us 8 interns to visit the Bulleh Shah Paper Mill - in Kasur. The reason being that they needed space in the department =P

But anyway, it was nice of them and the trip was FABULOUS. We got complete V.I.P. treatment over there (a first for all of us =P) and it was generally really good fun. The Mill is H-U-G-E. If any of you have seen Packages in Lahore, triple the size and then you get it similar to Bulleh Shah. Man its s frighteningly big. Pictures soon.

Other news - we've finally shifted. The amount of work is immense. I can't even think about how much there is to do =/

But we're all looking forward to it =)

Hope you guys are good.

-Maryam.

Week Two Starts.

And we're insanely busy now. Mostly calling up people for interviews and tests. HILARIOUS responses. Seriously. With regret and apologies, most of them don't sound like they ever went to school (I am NOT talking about accents) and the questions they ask are stunningly stupid. Aur ye Masters aur Ph.D kar ke bethe huay hain.

P.S. Ugly, I am SO gonna take your advice *fingers gun*

Plus.

Why. Do. Guys. STARE. So. Bad? It makes you damned uncomfortable. I kept imagining I had bogies on my face or something. Hudd hai. I mean, what?!

Banana Pancakes.

For some reason, I looooove this song <3 and especially the voice.

FINALLYYYYYYYYYYY!

So, remember the sikrit I was dropping not-so-subtle hints about? =D

This is it:

We're shifting. To this beautiful place which I am totally in love with. We're packing aj kal. Yay. I'm so happy =D

The best part is, it was completely unexpected. We didn't even KNOW we were ever going to shift but one day Baba comes home and goes like 'We bought a house!'. I swear we were dumbstruck. But anyway. YAY =D

Phir.

Things are pretty much insane.

More details later, when I'm actually home and not spending my entire day at the company =S

Not that I'm complaining. Its just that I'm never home now.

Okay, fine. I am complaining.

Ah, whatever. Hope all's well =)

18 And Older, Please.

I usually try to refrain from swearing ever since I learnt little girls read my blog. Also my not so little cousin *waves* Aleeta love, close your eyes.

I WAS FUCK BORED. LIKE FUCK BORED. I know, I know. First day, too many expectations, blah, shit, crap. But seriously. 8 baje se le kar shaam 5 baje tak I sat until my butt ached. Then had my 'lunch' at 11:30 because interns ko khana sirf 11:30 se 12:30 tak milta hai. Baaki sara din bhookay betho.

FUCK annoying.

FUCK boring.

FUCK khwaari.

Pata nai 4 hafte kaise guzrein ge.

Bling*

First day tomorrow.

Hope it goes well and that I don't screw anything up. Lawlz. I HATE people who actually pronounce
 L-O-L as 'lawlz'. *shudder*

But anyway.

*fingers crossed*

11:48 In The P.M.

Sometimes, I swear I have the worst luck in the world.

No.

No platitudes of 'ohhhhhhh don't be a whiny bitch, you're not the only one, blah blah'.

Don't need that.

Be whiny bitch with me? Yahokthenxsbye.

If You're Happy And You Know It...

The author is now an intern in an esteemed organization, with a huge and special project of her very own, which is also the first of its kind in the history of the organization BOO-YAH.

Haha, needless to mention, I'm really happy.

Lets just hope I'm up to it and don't disappoint =)

P.S. This is what I was asking you to pray for, earlier. Thank you =)

Hum Saray Pagal Hain.

Scene 1----

Moosa: Mona, paani la do.

Me: Acha. *brings water*

Moosa *drinks*: Ahhh... goofay mein thund pe gaee.

Me: HAHAHAHAHAHAHA WHAT?!


Scene 2-----

Mama: Moosa nehr mein nahana hai?

Me: Han jao, ghoray aur gaye ke sath naha kar ana.

Moosa: Haathi bhi hote hain!

Sid: Wahan genda be hota hai

Moosa: Jee nai. Doinal hota hai.

Mama and I go manic with loowftur.

Moosa: Doinal. Doinal hota hai.

Me: Ye kaunsa janwar hai?!

Moosa: Rhino =D


Scene 3----

Dad in the car singing: Tere long da peya lashkara....

Me: Aap aise ganay kahan se seekh ke atay hain?

Dado: Ye bachpan se aisa hai. Is ko khetun mein se utha ke lai thi.

Dad: Han inhon ne socha parha likha ke insan bana dun.

Me: ...

Dad: Tere long da peya lashkaraaaaaaaaaaaa

Barbies.

X: Meryem apaaaaa ayen meri doll ke sath khelen is ke do aur kapray be lai hun *holding up a tiny plastic hot pink suitcase*

Me: Um. I'm too old to play with dolls?

X: Nahhhiieeeennn abi to aap choti si hain!

Me: ... Fuck me.

Hope Therapy.

I am desperately in need of some.

I can't explain but... I'm stuck in this place where I have no idea what to do and how to do whatever I can do. And its frustrating and annoying and I'm sort of scared, too.

Because this is... big. I'm being vague, I know. I can't help it right now.

Just pray for me, that things work out for the best.

That's all.