Yeah so, I've decided its pretty much a given i won't pass. I can't. Because this is the first time that I haven't studied the day before the exam. Usually by now, I get attacked by my conscience and start studying. But this time, I think it gave up on me and died. I don't know what to do. I take up my notes, prepare myself for hours of study and the next thing you know, I'm staring at the walls and thinking random thoughts.
Nothing helps. My best friend, she's made herself ill with studying and stressing and worrying. I haven't even STARTED. And the worst part? Every single person goes "Oh, don't worry, you'll pass, you're so good, blah blah blah."
Yeah SURE I will. I mean, I do not know a SINGLE word and half of the stuff, I don't understand; though that's mainly because of the bootiful anglish used. And why does everyone think I'm some sort of genius?! I do NOT get genius grades. My highest GPA so far has been 3.1. Is that genius? NO, it is NOT. People have UNFAIR expectations. ESPECIALLY my parents. Why, oh WHY, do you expect me to be an over-achiever?! I'm not yar! Please, try to understand I cannot be a nerd. No matter how much I try, or want to, I CANNOT.
I wish I were, though. It would make life so much easier. And my parents so happy. Dammit. Upar se my younger sister. In her A-1 midterms, she got an A, A, A+ and a B. WHAT kind of grades are those? And I'm not HER, why do you expect me to get the same result?! Even my best friend doesn't understand. Even SHE is all "Nai, nai, yar. You'll do fayyyyynnnneee".
The world misunderstands.
Maybe I SHOULD fail. That'll make everyone believe me. Hmm.
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